Olympic Trials Day 2

(Read about Day 1 here)

Another world record set, this one is mine…..Two nights consecutive, of actual, you know…SLEEP.

Only complaint so far: the coffee cups in Carson Hall’s dining room are WAY too small.

At breakfast, I sit next to fellow umpire Dan, a Washington State grad from back in the day. He recalls doing a marathon as a race walker and blowing past 4x World Record holder Henry Rono, who had since put on a hundred extra pounds. 

This morning, a casual 5k fun run. My man Ron is the honorary starter, and many of the attendees are old friends of Joan as well. 

Ron’s former Reebok agent, Mike

As the field is lined up, a couple of hobby joggers go by, except that their hobby pace is a bit faster; Woody and Grant, 1-2 in the men’s 10,000m last night, and first time Olympians. Everyone goes nuts!

I love track!

My man Duncan took a great shot of me looking suspicious…

I mention my man Grant Fisher, he of the fast wheels and an Olympic berth in the 10,000m last night, not to mention a sighting at the fun run this morning. Who do i run into at daily COVID testing but Mr Grant Fisher? 

I know, he looks like he’s 12. He runs like a man possessed. 

The dining hall is taking no prisoners: that’s a steak pizza with peppers and onions, and a side of some excellent chicken and tempeh with noodles. 

 

There’s a Eugene company that makes mini vehicles, street legal. This would be a cool toy to use for around town! Think Peter Gregory in the show ‘Silicon Valley.’

While out during the afternoon break, I remember that two of our starters like their beer. And an umpire looked at my Deschutes Brewery neck gaiter and commented that she loves a good IPA. So I successfully seek out these….

We bang on the (closed) dining hall doors and get three plastic bags full of ice. Score!!!! Note: I don’t drink beer, but it’s nice to make other people happy when they don’t expect it. So right now, there is beer in my sink staying cold for them. 

But alas, I must return to the reason I’m here….

During the briefing before the event begins, I make reference to Birmingham, England. The chief umpire, a Brit, glares at me and says, ‘WHAT did you say?’

Oh, sorry: Birming-um. Clearly I’ve lost the right to sample some Shepard’s Pie. 

In the women’s 100m hurdles semifinals, Taliyah Brooks stands out. Not necessarily for her running prowess, but for her amazing, sea anenome-like head of hair. 

One of the starters just shakes her head and says, “I love track!” Since that’s my tagline, I’m thinking of suing her for royalties. 

Ugh. Women’s 100m semi…Aleia Hobbs blatantly false starts in front of me and is disqualified. She moves to a corner of the track and sobs. 

I hate, Hate, HATE the false start rule. One twitch and you’re gone. I asked a highly ranked track administrator to name another sport that has a similarly draconian process. He said, “drag racing.”

I nearly screamed. Drag racing is a third or fourth tier sport!!!! THAT’S what we’re comparing ourselves to? Years back, Usain Bolt was DQ’d from the World Championships, and the fans went home disappointed that they couldn’t see him run. 

My proposal…a false start in the 100m earns you a 0.10 second penalty, or 0.20 in the 200m. You can still run, but you have to work even harder. Modern timing systems could make the adjustment without delay….I can’t get any traction on this idea….does anyone have Phil Knight’s cell phone number? 

OMG OMG OMG….women’s 1500m semi finals. My man Chuck’s daughter runs like a stud and gets a big Q….when she crosses the line, Chuck (sitting behind me) yells “BOOM!” and pumps his fist like a 14 year old little league player who just hit his first homer. Chuck knows of what he speaks: he was 4th in the Olympic Trials in 1984. 

Translation: the top 5 finishers in each semi automatically advance to the final (big Q) along with the next 2 fastest runners (little q). Chuck’s daughter is looking SOLID; if she qualifies on Monday, I’m going to break umpire protocol and get a picture of him bawling his eyes out. 

Between events, Finish Line Head Official Lloyd hands me this…

It’s maybe the only souvenir i have that says 2021….everything else is branded 2020 before the rescheduling, and I guess it was too expensive to reprint things. 

Fun day. The weather starts heating up, and so does the competition. 

I love track!

Olympic Trials Day 1

Been a long wait, but we’re finally haze grey and underway. 

(That’s Navy slang for all you landlubbers).

First meal in the dining hall, another official sees my Navy shirt. Turns out his son is an Annapolis 1/c (senior) and Trident Scholar (very, very smart). The official is also the photographer for the only known picture that makes me look badass: he popped this sucker at the 2016 Trials without my knowledge. The reflection of the track is what makes it, not my furrowed brow or GQ-worthy stubble.

Tremendous swag haul. 6 shirts, rain gear, hat, sneaks, a partridge in a pear tree. 

At the rental house…..Roommate #1; Joanie, an Olympic finalist in 1984. And Roommate #2: RJ, an Olympic Trials medalist from 1996. He drives up from San Diego (in one day)…the man has a heavy right foot.

Ron decorates our crash pad the right way. 

Roger, a fellow umpire, does Christian ministry trips to China, and at one point overseas is restrained, arrested, locked up, kicked out. He keeps going back for more. Good dude. 

College classmates Duncan and Chris attend their second Trials in a row. Last time, Chris somehow recognizes me from afar 30 years after graduation. 

The best American high jump coach may well be former NFL QB Randall Cunningham; his daughter Vashti is near the top of the heap in the vertical jumps.

My lunch tray runneth over….

But I ate half the pizza and all the vegetables. 

Nice medal swag. 

I look for Ron and Joanie in the stands. Hmmmmm….they’re leaving. Odd, since we have more running races coming up. Later, when moving from one assignment to another, I get massive heckling from the upper deck; they relocate for a better view and cast aspersions my way. I expect nothing less. 

They move just in time to see a massive WORLD RECORD in the men’s shot put! ‘Massive’ is a good word: while most winners jog a victory lap, the shot putters walk. Runner up Joe Kovacs is wider than he is tall. 

Men’s 10,000m final; at the starting line, i realize Grant Fisher looks like he’s 12, and 195 year old Lopez Lomong has quads that look like a roadmap of vascularity. Late in the race, Lopez pulls up with cramps…he rolls up his shirt to show not a six pack but an entire case of ridiculously ripped abs. 

With a mile to go, there are 16 guys still in the hunt. That means a ripping finish, and it is. Three first timers make the team. 

Wow, I feel bad for Ben True; probably his last chance for an Olympic Team, and he’s 4th. Again. 

On the way out, the hospitality tent is getting rid of their inventory. You don’t have to ask me twice.

Later, RJ runs into the new world record holder Ryan Crouser and proclaims him legit. I cannot confirm whether they had an arm-wrestling contest. 

Good start to the Trials! More tomorrow. 

NCAA Championships

It’s go time. 

Covid restrictions are finally lifting, just in time for possibly my favorite track meet, the NCAA Championships. The University of Oregon has hosted probably 8 times in the last decade or so. 

#SpoiledRotten

We have to be Covid cleared in advance; either a full vaccination card or testing. They request officials be screened and get their gear on Sunday….I don’t arrive until Tuesday (#LivingInTheSticks)…..next opportunity is 0630 Wednesday, first day of the meet. Hmmm….I plan to drive over Tuesday, so I ask the meet ops boss for clarification. She says, Tuesday check-in is primarily teams, but we’ll make an exception for you. 

Great. I arrive at Autzen Stadium, the football venue. Get my clearance sticker. Go to swag pickup. ‘Sorry, officials can’t get your credential and gear until tomorrow morning.’

Hmmmm…i was told otherwise. Them: ‘Who told you that?’

The meet ops boss. Aka your boss….In five minutes, I have my gear, and I’m on my merry way. 

I call chief umpire Ryan, recently arrived from Iowa, and I meet him for a drink at the Valley River Inn. 

He has no gear or credential, ‘because they told me I couldn’t get my stuff until tomorrow.’ 

I guess it pays to ask questions! But now the chief umpire is mad at me…though he did buy my a ginger whiskey. 

                                     

                         

Lane County goes to low risk today. So the ticket office is OPEN! Let’s fill this beast. 

Nice swag. Finally get me one of those floppy sun shade hats. 

Unmemorable catered dinner at the track; I eat all the cauliflower and half the lasagna. Meh. 

Watching the hammer throw from the concourse. 

`

First day…no rain in the forecast, so i leave my raingear in the car.

Then it pours. Here’s the MVP of the meet: my rubberized shoe covers like motorcylists wear. But I have a feeling Peter Fonda and Dennis Hopper would turn their noses up. 

The actual MVP is my man Tim, a fellow umpire who got stuck in traffic and arrived late.  He was surplus, so he offered to walk the 3 blocks to my car and grab the gear. I owe that man a big drink!

Great names in the men’s 100…Ismael, Micah, JoVaughn. But none of them can hold a candle to former Arkansas sprinter Kenzo Cotton…100, 200, 4x100, 4x400, built like Eric Heiden…and an Academic All American. The lad is going places. 

In the 4x100m relay, runners 2-4 are allowed to put tape marks on the track; when the incoming runner passes the mark, the outgoing runner takes off and hopefully is near full speed for the baton pass. After the runners go, we highly experienced officials have the job of removing yards of tape and collecting the surplus rolls. EBay, anyone? 

 Alex, I’d like “Something I’ve never heard in a 4x400m Relay” for $1000. The answer: What is “BYU takes the lead?” That school is not known for sprint prowess. 

Found my boy Chuck. When he’s not capturing the track world as a professional photographer, he moonlights as an MD. One of his daughters made the NCAA final, and his other daughter qualified for the Olympic Trials next week. Oh btw, he was the first NM resident and the first Notre Damer to run a 4 minute mile. I’ll see Chuck a lot in the next two weeks!

Chuck and i do get into a violent argument, though. He says the best Mexican food in Albuquerque is at Barela’s, and I can't imagine anything better than The Frontier. I think i need a verification trip. 

The second day’s catering is a really yummy chicken and yakisoba dish. Too bad i just ate sushi at Market of Choice. 

I wear my raingear all day Thursday, and it worked. No rain. I won’t be so lucky for the next two days, but I’ll do my best. 

And I'm getting smarter...my inside coat pockets have long johns, a bandana, the aforementioned boots, power bars, etc....I feel like a guy hocking fake watches in Times Square...

                                                 

The REALLY important people....starters. I try to be nice to people who carry guns. 

                                                       

Billy Crystal in City Slickers....."and a spaceship lands." The stadium sure does look extra-terrestrial. 

                            

Umpire briefing before the fun. 

                                         

In the "I know a guy who knows a guy" category....parking on or near any college campus is impossible. My host worked at this mini mart literally across the street from the track, and procured me a parking spot behind the dumpsters for the duration. A three minute walk to the track?!? It literally does not get any better than this! And the store is amazingly stocked; on any given day, you'll see Olympians walking in to buy pork rinds and wine. 

                                          

Friday is men's finals, and my life flashes before my eyes in the 1500. Oregon kid Cole Hocker has a shot at the title and is a huge crowd favorite. On two separate laps, right in front of me, he's involved in distinct and separate kerfluffles. With a lump in my throat, I do my duty and write up the incidents. He wins the title with a furious sprint, but if he's disqualified, I imagine I will be banned from setting foot in the state ever again. Fortunately, the contact was accepted as 'Just Racing,' and the victory stands pat. 

The Oklahoma State team is sitting behind me, screaming their fool heads off for their guy in the steeplechase. Contending for the win, he eats Mondo over the last barrier and does well to finish third. (Translation: Mondo is the track material. He caught a food on the hurdle and went down hard. Sad panda).

NC A&T has come out of nowhere to build a powerhouse team. Coach's kid and sophomore Randolph Ross drops a ridiculous 43.85 in the 400m. If he does that at the Olympic Trials, he'll almost certainly be leaving Tokyo with a relay gold medal (and world record). That relay team will be stacked and unfair. 

Curry chicken was decent. 

                                        

A Saturday morning stroll up Spencer's Butte. Hint: a whole lotta uphill. 

 

Driving to the meet for the final day. Sun is shining, birds are chirping, and I am absolutely blaring 'Birdland' by Maynard Ferguson (thank you to my HS band teacher Rick Coulter for opening my eyes). Music seriously does not get any better.....google it. 

Pulled turkey with mac and cheese. Portions too big...i ate half. And my college classmate Tim has much better game. 

                   

The meet director asks me why my incident reports from the previous day ended up in the steeplechase pit. I have no idea, since I didn’t write up any fouls at that end of the track. Turns out, the head umpire had a paperwork malfunction and lost control of the documents I gave him. At least I didn’t take it personally!

A tiny Air Force senior wins the women's steeple with a furious sprint and perfect lean. I guess Colorado Springs isn't a country club after all.......signed, Navy '87. 

(no, USAFA really IS a country club)

NC A&T girl wins the 100/200 double in lightning fast times. Where did that school come from?!?

Nice trophy for the worthy and swift. 

Texas A&M freshman Athing Mu breaks her own 400m NCAA record, then runs a ridiculous anchor leg in the mile relay. Her times put her among the best in the world....she's a FRESHMAN. I'd bet her on the Olympic podium in 2024, and wouldn't rule her out for this year, either. 

After she receives her trophy and walks off the track in front of me, she squeals to her teammates, "SO FUN!"

Another classic name in the women's 5000m: Poppy Tank of Utah. 

No worries, Phil (Knight). I took care of your track for you. 

                                     

See y'all next week! Same bat time, same bat channel.