Blue Diva, meet CFG

When Zoe was 16 (I had moved out), she asked both parents for a van as a                  Christmas present. Her plan was to live in the Deschutes National Forest. 

I asked what prompted this idea. 

She said it was so she wouldn’t be a burden on either of us. 

If you’ve never felt like you’ve failed as a parent, just have your kid make that statement to you. 

My ex was regularly telling her that they’re broke and will be poverty stricken because Bad Dad left. All while they were living in a million dollar house in a very nice neighborhood, with mortgage payments equal to my tiny apartment’s  rent. Zoe figured she could help reduce costs by living in a van in the woods.

I will never forgive my ex for putting those thoughts of fear into Zoe’s head.

Zoe’s first car was an estate sale PT Cruiser that lasted about two years. She then went thru two old vans that needed lots of duct tape. After the last van rebelled, i said she could have Bernard, my 2009 Subaru hatchback. A great car with relatively low mileage, and a stick shift that she’d have to learn. 

Took her 15 minutes to get the timing down. 

Now 4 Wheeled Bernard (Lagat, IYKYK) is feeling his age. 

I’m on a job in San Francisco. The rental house I found is big enough for two,    just in case she wanted to visit over the summer. My music DJ kid finds a huge 3 day music festival in Golden Gate Park that she and a friend will attend….then Zoe asks if she can live here the entire summer. 

Dad always plans ahead. 

Zoe’s stage name is Fruit Girl. My kid is nothing if not quirky. 

Bernard shows a caution light the week before Zoe comes down. She brings him to the dealer…I ask her to pay and I’ll Venmo her. 

She says the payment will exceed her credit limit and the car will take a week for repairs. 

I thought this was an oil change. 

Yes, with fluids top off. 

And a cracked suspension arm. 

And a head gasket leak. 

And bald tires. 

Five grand. 

Nope. I planned on getting her a car for graduation, and now that transaction will happen a year early. 

I told her about the new car at lunch yesterday. A Subaru Outback with room for her artwork and music gear, the vehicle to launch her into adulthood. 

She burst into tears, said she feels guilty about me spending the money. Says she doesn’t deserve it. 

Gawd. I wonder where she learned that from? 

(He asks as he looks in a mirror at a guy who has told himself the same thing many times)

That kid is gonna break me in half. 

After Zoe calmed down, she told me she had something important to tell me. 

Yikes. Leaving school? Pregnant? No. 

She said she’s quitting pot. She had been using for appetite stimulation (she’s very thin, the consequence of a dysfunctional family breakup), and for emotional escape. And she’s been very open with me about it; 3 years of voluntary therapy at the same time. 

Never been more proud of my kid. It’s been amazing to see the trust rebuilt between us. 

Sent her pix of the car: the color is Cosmic Blue Pearl (how fitting). She named her Blue Diva. 

I could save $200 by going with standard license plates. 

Nope. Kid’s getting custom plates if the letters are available. 

FRT GRL.